Why do I put so much pressure on myself? 

Reading a magazine and it refers to ‘societies pressures’ I found it relatively ironic as it was filled with more than likely airbrushed (albeit beautiful) unattainable images. 

Whilst I feel, like everyone, I assume, societies pressures but I feel like the pressures I put on myself are far higher. 

Im 29 and I feel like I know nothing… I can’t contour my face, I don’t know a lot about politics, my nails aren’t 100% perfect EVER! I feel like I constantly need to grow up and learn about EVERYTHING. 

Curiosity might have killed the cat,but I feel like comparison to everyone and everything will surely kill me! 

I see ages in magazines next to women who have accomplished so much.. and I was just happy to have made it through the day without an anxiety attack. 

I know it’s quite difficult for me to see my own positives. It’s So overwhelming, I feel like the more I know the more stressed I get, but the more I feel like I need to take an interest in current affairs. 

I recently installed Crowdfire. I got so overwhelmed with professional blog tools, I quickly uninstalled it. Whilst I applaud anyone who has a really professional looking blog,infact any blog, I know that it just wasn’t for me. It was so numbers focused and felt like just another platform which I can obsess over.

Social media is one of the best/worst places to find yourself immersed in a world that isn’t all that real. Whilst I know this, I still feel that need to be better at something which is entirely staged. 

I can count so many things I haven’t done or that other people are doing, that I feel like I should know.  

When it comes to the things I’m good at, I get stuck. 

I’ve already talked about how much the world overwhelms me and Im unsure if this is part of that,  or a whole seperate issue?

Is it just me? 

Love Sooz x

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65 thoughts on “Why do I put so much pressure on myself? 

  1. I wrote about this in a blog post a while ago, it’s called Behind in life?!, I think you should have a read, it might help you look at things a different way. Well, I’d hope so! It’s not just you that feels this pressure, or puts it on themselves, it’s totally normal! x

    Liked by 3 people

  2. I think we all do it. It’s such a shame as we all have our own strengths as well as weaknesses but we somehow see past them and focus on others strengths. ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  3. “Im 29 and I feel like I know nothing… I can’t contour my face, I don’t know a lot about politics, my nails aren’t 100% perfect EVER! I feel like I constantly need to grow up and learn about EVERYTHING.” snap, snap and snap!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. We are all on a different journey, Sooz, and sometimes it can feel like an uphill struggle, but do be aware that those polished images you see in magazines or those people seemingly having amazing lives on social media probably have their own issues going on too. It’s just that they’re choosing not to let you see that. It’s so easy to feel like we’re inadequate or under-achieving, even though we’re not. Best wishes on your journey.

    Liked by 3 people

  5. I feel the same way. I try to blog for me. If anyone reads it-awesome. If not? I got my catharsis. I work in marketing so everything I do is numbers driven and obsession over likes, impressions, views, interactions. It’s overwhelming for my job let alone if I was tracking it for my blog. As for not feeling accomplished at 29… gurrl… at 29 I didn’t know sh$t. I’m 39 and I’m still learning. YouTube videos are awesome for learning makeup tricks. Schedule time for you to learn once a week. But never compare yourself to others. You need to remember each journey is different and entirely our own. We have to live it. Their priorities in life are different than yours and that’s ok. Follow your path and don’t worry about the crowd. Xoxo

    Liked by 2 people

  6. First, you should read this – http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-39154628
    And then I wanted to respond, too. I just turned 32. I have a hard time reading about current events because they overwhelm me, so I only read up on the parts I can handle and ignore the rest. I stopped caring if I didn’t know as much as other people. You have to know yourself and what you can handle. And that’s a hard path.

    Also, as I went through some hellish learning experiences and overwhelming anxiety about what I was doing with my life and where I was going during the end of my 20’s, specifically years 28-30, several people told me that the same experience happened to them. It’s like those years are your first life crisis where you are suddenly re-evaluating everything about yourself.

    Heck, I still don’t know what I am doing. I am working in a position I like but isn’t entirely specific to what I want to do. I’ve been on disability for a few years for fibromyalgia and other things I don’t feel like mentioning. I blog and write. My wife brings home the money for the household, and the guilt can be overwhelming too. Sometimes it’s about learning to say no to yourself, I think.

    I don’t know if this helped. It was a ramble.

    Liked by 3 people

  7. I feel the same way. I try to blog for me. If anyone reads it-awesome. If not? I got my catharsis. I work in marketing so everything I do is numbers driven and obsession over likes, impressions, views, interactions. It’s overwhelming for my job let alone if I was tracking it for my blog. As for not feeling accomplished at 29… gurrl… at 29 I didn’t know ish. I’m 39 and I’m still learning. YouTube videos are awesome for learning makeup tricks. Schedule time for you to learn once a week. But never compare yourself to others. You need to remember each journey is different and entirely our own. We have to live it. Their priorities in life are different than yours and that’s ok. Follow your path and don’t worry about the crowd. Xoxo

    Liked by 3 people

  8. Haha, I totally agree with you! 37 and no idea on the make up thing. And I DON’T care. I have way better things to do with my time that watch videos about how to look perfect. No one looks perfect. I work in the media and you should see the amount of make-up they put on these ‘celebrities’ to make them look good on camera. Trust me, on camera is totally different to real life! I can’t afford to spend an hour every morning and two hundred different products to get ‘the look’ (which is mostly thick cement face with stripy bits). Does it really matter what I look like anyway? And to who? As long as I’m happy with me I don’t care. Don’t get me wrong, I wear make-up when necessary but I’m not going to go the gym in a full face or walk the dog on a Sunday morning wearing blusher and eye-liner (unless it’s left over from the night before). My face is my face, deal with it or get lost. If you can’t see past it I won’t be able to see past your shallow perspectives.

    As for politics – it’s all propaganda anyway. Why was the ‘killer clown’ craze even news? Because it was news? Hell no. It was the media trying to take your attention away from something important that was actually happening that either they, or the government, didn’t want to draw attention to.

    You don’t need to feel overwhelmed by these things. No one knows it all and most people don’t know anything about these things beyond what they’re fed by whatever medium they consume, TV, newspapers, the web.This information is bias or ‘selected’ anyway and probably doesn’t even matter. Real information needs to be sought out, especially the important stuff, but most of us don’t have time do that. What matters is that you can function on a day to day basis, that you are not overwhelmed by daily tasks, or at least have a coping mechanism to deal with them.

    Angelique is right. Each of our journeys is different and you today might feel overwhelmed by Crowdfire but you in a few months might be ready for the challenge. That’s why each day we leave ourselves behind and become someone new.

    Much Love x

    Liked by 3 people

      1. I think it’s the same for most people. Some of the ‘celebs’ I’ve worked with are so very pretty in real life they don’t need all of the make-up in real life. Unfortunately HD cameras and tv lighting are not flattering to anyone so make-up is sadly a must. 😔

        Liked by 1 person

  9. I can totally relate. I’m my own worst critic and am so hard on myself when I make a mistake. Sometimes I’d like to get rid of all social media, as it’s bad for comparing yourself or your life with others. But it’s still nice to connect to others that way, especially being a stay-at-home mom who doesn’t socialize as much as I used to.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I know what you mean. I think we all feel this way some times (most of the time?). Personally, I love what you’re doing with your blog! I don’t even know what Crowdfire is, so there’s that. You’re one up on this old cat!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I am 42, have a college degree, and still feel like I don’t know anything! You are not alone! We are our own worst critic, and that is good and bad. If we see our true faults and try to correct them while also seeing our attributes, it can be a powerful thing. Sadly, we often see our greatest attributes as faults. Chin up, you are amazing!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. I am a man in my 70’s and here is my take on it. All of social media is an illusion. It is not reality. It does not exist in the physical world. It is like the “Matrix”. Pull the plug, and ALL of it goes away! At your age, none of this existed for me or anyone. Put it all in perspective. The technology companies and information companies push it all on us like we must have it or we will miss out on something. It is all for $. So, have fun with it–there is entertainment value there, but don’t fret about it. Yes, even I have my own blog! However, it has little to do with reality–only an exercise for amusement. PS I still don’t know much about anything!

    Liked by 7 people

  13. Slow down. Love yourself. That’s my prescription.

    The world is full of “more” and “now” and we tend to think that’s the best way to get what we want and achieve greatness. We forget to really appreciate what is happening RIGHT NOW – and we don’t love ourselves. We strive so hard to be BETTER that we forget that it takes practice and hard work to get there. Slow steps. Ease up. We can’t have it all. We really don’t want it all.

    And if we are always trying to make things better and constantly wanting more, we also forget to love ourselves. We will never be happy (even if we achieve all the MORE and WANT) with ourselves if we don’t just stop and love ourselves. It’s not easy to do, and it takes work and baby steps – but in the long run, if we can love ourselves in the skin we’re in, we are WAY AHEAD OF THE GAME.

    p.s. I’ve felt every single thing you said here – and relate to every bit – so my prescription is one I’ve given myself.

    Liked by 2 people

  14. The thing with social media is that 80% of it is fake. People only show their success, so don’t worry you are not alone. We are all growing up, even the people that seem to have a perfect life and know everything. They are just like you, maybe they are just so good at hiding it. In fact, I believe seeking attention and approval through social media is the symptom of something going wrong and a loro of insecurity. Just keep doing your best and don’t worry about what you see! 😘😘

    Liked by 3 people

  15. Not just you … we live in an overwhelming world of technology and having to keep up with a fast pace that our bodies (and minds) were not designed to do … comparison is the thief of all joy .. I’ve pulled back a lot from a side of social media I was very involved with ( a runners group on Facebook that I founded and managed) it was too overwhelming and too competitive – it robbed the joy of running for me – plus I didn’t have 300 messages waiting for me every day … simplify is my way forwards for 2017 and I’m very much on the road to happiness 🙂 xx

    Liked by 3 people

  16. I love this post so much! All the comments were excellent. I can’t think of anything to add. I’m the same. Forty-four and you never have it figured it our, at least not me.
    Social media is a blessing and a curse. I’m so glad I didn’t grow up with it. I grew up in the eighties. I don’t even know how to import/export files, lol! And I don’t care, really.
    I read too much news. I don’t understand why girls contour their face with five layers of foundation, or whatever the process is, it looks like an uncomfortable way to go through the day. And I love makeup.
    Keep being you. I love your blog…xx CC

    Liked by 2 people

  17. Sooz, Thank you for another great and honest post. I’m a lot older than you and I am still often overwhelmed by all of the things you speak of. I don’t think life is a destination that you suddenly arrive at feeling satisfied that you now know enough. I also don’t think you need to Keep up! Let it go, relax and enjoy what you do know. Finding your passion isn’t something that everyone does, but finding things that you enjoy shouldn’t be too difficult. Meanwhile don’t beat yourself up, you are still very young. Life is a struggle sometimes for everyone. Social media is only “highlights” and if you pick the bones out of most of them, they really aren’t that high either.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Love your post. I’m so with you girl! I gained a lot of weight from an injury (care taking my mother before she passed). After 9 months of bed rest and a 40 lb weight gain I feel ya sista! Keep writing and keep connecting with us. I think your article was brave, your brave to reveal and talk about this issue. We all have moments in life we shine but, when we’re not feeling so “sparkly” is when putting in work is key. Finding inspiration isn’t always easy but know there are a bunch of us girls all over that feel like your posting reflected. KEEP IT UP GIRL!

    Liked by 1 person

  19. I love the honesty and realness of your post.. The best advice I can give you as a “mature” woman (Yep in my 40’s) I will tell you that the most freeing thing you can do for yourself is NOT TO COMPARE YOURSELF TO ANYONE. You are so unique and special in your own way. You will achieve what you are ready to achieve. Don’t push anything or force yourself to know/learn anything. One thing I have learned is that if I am not 1000% interested in something and I try to “push” myself to learn it, it just doesn’t happen. I have to be passionate about it and really be “sold” to knowing/learning it 1000%. Just ENJOY who you are TODAY. Don’t worry about tomorrow or the next day. It’s the celebrating the little things that will build up your self esteem and love for yourself and your uniqueness. You were created to be You.. Just special You! Celebrate your uniqueness cause NO ONE ELSE IS LIKE YOU 🙂

    RMSORG

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Nope, definitely not just you! There have been all kinds of studies about how detrimental womens magazines are because they are NOT REAL. Maybe their face was contoured by a professional makeup artist, and then it was photo-shopped anyway.

    The other, non-external stuff is way more important anyway 😉 And F “rules” too!

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Oh, dear, Sooz. I’m a decade (nearly 2) older than you, and I have learned how to contour my face, know a lot about politics, have had great nails. And you know, it really doesn’t make a huge difference!!! I have accomplished a lot of things – and yet I still get anxiety attacks, and feel like I don’t know anything! So don’t sweat it so much, sweetie! You’re doing FiNE!!! Let life just happen and try to chase after the fun parts.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. I can relate completely to this! I will be 29 this summer and I feel like I have accomplished nothing in my life. While my family and friends tell me they are proud and have accomplished so much, my reply is “like what?” I feel like everything is not enough. Like I should be able to do more or be more because other people can. It’s exhausting!!

    Liked by 1 person

  23. I feel like you have just read my mind with this blogpost! I worry about so many things – am I pretty enough, kind enough, smart enough, do my colleagues like me, is my life heading where I want it to, what more could I do… I could go on and on! I find trying not to compare myself to others the best thing. My path is mine to walk and it won’t be the same as anyone else’s and so only I can chose the way I go

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Wow it feels as though I could have also written part of this post – the pressures we put on ourselves is insane, but then, a lot of that pressure does come from external sources (like the media). I wouldn’t even know where to begin in terms of contouring my face haha!

    Liked by 1 person

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