Hanging on the weight loss wagon by two fingernails! 

Guess what I had for breakfast… 

2 x boiled eggs

2 x dry toast 

1x chocolate bar and numerous swigs of a bottle of diet coke in the fridge! 

My food is the biggest aspect… When I’m good I’m really good, but when I’m bad it’s a painful affair of gluttony! 

I completed no junk July… Now it’s all the junk August! I’ve been having some digestive problems and I think I’ve thought fuck it, if healthy food is going to make me ill, then I’m just gonna eat what I want… Self destruct at its finest! 

I cook healthy meals and post them on Instagram, then I snack and don’t post the unhealthy stuff… Lying to myself and my followers is a slippery slope! 

I know this needs to change and fast. I know I’m wallowing like a hippopotamus! A fat one!

 Do we need time just to sneak back to our old comforter?

 An alcoholic or a drug addict goes cold turkey but what does a food addict do, addicted to the comfort, addicted to the rows and rows of glorious food in Technicolor shops drawing you in?

 Do we stop eating? No! 

Is it just my pure laziness that I can’t actually be bothered, or is it that I’m under so much stress that the only quiet time I get, is when I can’t hear anything, even my own thoughts because I’m chewing. 

I began a journey on 19/04/2015 thinking the change was purely physical, but it’s 98% mental. 

Exercising is mental 

Eating is mental 

Food addiction is mental 

Yet all of the gains and losses are physical!

 My physical being is the product of my mind… So, right now I’m in the gutter! I’m tired, so tired. I’m fed up of medical condition after medical condition being discovered. Last night I said to L … 

If I make it to an old lady, I’ll be surprised

Her reply…

Don’t worry, you’re already a little old lady, in mind, spirit and boobs! 

She is always supportive, and having someone who is supportive is at least something. Who mentions how much diet coke you’re drinking, or how much chocolate you’re eating. Someone you can talk to about anything. But who will give you a kick up the arse you need, or make you laugh when needed! 

These were my birthday goals… I’m not in teen sizes yet! I’m still a 20-22-24 depending on the material and the fit. I’m really sad about that if I’m honest, I’d of tried harder I could have been. 
However the rest, I have done. I’m proud of that. But going back to my Instagram shows that I have let things slip. 

My food

My exercise

My posts

My creativity

It’s time to get out of this rut, it’s time to smash it, IT’S TIME! 

Instead of clinging onto the wagon, I want to be driving it! 

To morph from a hippopotamus to a graceful gazelle!  

Battle cry! 

 I will be posting all of my meals, snacks and plans on Instagram! I will attempt to cut out snacking! 
Find me @discoveringsooz 
Love Sooz x

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13 thoughts on “Hanging on the weight loss wagon by two fingernails! 

  1. Why not allow yourself treats at certain times so it’s less of a mental strain?
    When I last went on a weight loss thing I was good during the week, then weekends I let go a bit, it wasn’t a binge, just a relax. It worked well. But I know what you mean, when it got to the winter of that year, I couldn’t help it and it went to pot.
    Good luck sooz!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Good luck

    You need to find something that works for you. I made up my own (check out my first blog…it may give you some ideas). It had to be easy to do and, almost more importantly, easy to maintain and turn into a long term habit / way of life. My diet meant that it only ever really felt like I was dieting for one day.

    Anyway, I hope you find something that works for yoy

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ohhh God this has just made me laugh, not at you but with u, it’s good to know it’s not just me! Not that I wish for u to be struggling! Ahh shut up Emma! I too am my own worst enemy!!! Currently sat in my slimming world class after losing half a pound! I didnt deserve half a pound! Cos I ain’t been that good, meals r good, snacking on biscuits is endless!!!! 😱😱 but I have been out on my bike 🚴🏻 X

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Yes. This. I’ve been going through something similar- put on 10 lbs post-surgery. I’ve been having similar feelings, if it makes you any better. It’s not the best outlook, but perhaps more common than we expect.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Hey don’t give up hope. Many have been where you are and have succeeded and for many still the struggle continues. I look forward to your updates and will urge you to try some healthy ways to lose weight. You can do it.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Well Done on All the Weight You have lost and getting this far on your journey!
    I’ve been reading a few of your posts and you seem to not have a very healthy relationship with food. (Just what I notice, could be wrong)

    Deprivation and misery on diets often leads to the Binge and it’s very hard to maintain. Even these no Junk months, you have put an idea in your head that the diet ends on a specified date, then when it ends you go back to old habits.
    Diet and eating is a very personal thing, like you said nobody knows or sees what you do when you not on Social Media, that’s how it damages you…

    I think you need to be kinder to yourself and ask yourself who are you really doing this for? Cut out the bad, allow a cheat day, and if you do indulge, don’t throw in the towel, get back into it.

    Try to find a plan you can live with everyday for the rest of your life.
    Do it for your own health and well being. If wellness is your goal, weight loss is the side effect❤️
    All the best, xoxo A

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Hi Sooz,
    I’ve done the big weight loss twice, first when I got to college and I lost approx 85lbs, and then post-baby when I lost 75lbs, and been battling it ever since. Of course, medications for other things don’t help, some make you fly up the scale, the others way down.

    You need to give yourself a break too. Trying to lose weight is anxiety producing which can cause your body to a. hold onto fat stores and b. crave more food. And as for sizes f*** them (excuse my language!) Each different store is all over the place. In some I can now wear a 4, in others, I wear a 10. The system makes NO sense!

    Remember – you have already lost the amount of weight equivalent to a middle-schooler, every time you feel bad, think of that – you have rid a whole other human from your body, lol! 🙂

    I’d love to chat with you more about weight loss, anxiety, etc. All journeys I am taking, and I love your blog!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I love your site! And yes..oy…all the mental that goes into the physical loss! I REALLY need to lose weight for my blood pressure but am having a hard time doing anything about it…this was encouraging to read and I am going to give you a follow on IG!

    Liked by 1 person

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